Lucky Loses It

Mid-week blues. Allergies are going crazy today and being woken up half an hour earlier than my alarm makes me cranky. I was flipping through my fitness Instagram account last night and it depressed me. I started this journey (or at least documenting it by photos) on August 28, 2013. Almost one year later, I virtually look the same. Something has to be going on. I'm either not being true to myself, my tracking or honest with my food intake. Either that, or something is truly off balance inside of me, hormonally or my cortisol levels are so out of whack they are making me retain every bit of stress, guilt and grudges I've accumulated all year and rounding my belly out with them. I admit I am still holding grudges, I am still stressed out, I still have anxiety etc, but I don't believe it's too the point of where I should be hindered this much from losing weight. Part of me wanting to track again and use this blog was to see what works and what doesn't, and use it ...

I Well, I didn't make it back to the gym after work last night, but I did go home and knock out some shoulder presses with 25# dumb bells, 5x5, and in between did a set of 12 push ups. I hung out in the garage (literally) and toyed around with my body band for assisted pull ups and leg raises. I feel like I've gotten a few millimeters closer to pulling myself up. It's going to be a long, long process.Also, my hands are beginning to feel like sandpaper. Go callous, go! I made some chana masala last night with potatoes and mushrooms for dinner so I got my carb fix. I did not want to wake up this morning (still battling never ending fatigue), but 5:45 am came and up we went to the gym. I've got to start prepping the BF better the night before so we can get out of the house earlier. I'm not getting to the gym until about 7 am, which puts me on a machine by 7:10 and only gives me 30-35 min to work out before I have to make myself presentable for work. I fear the day I ...

I've definitely burned some calories. Well, this tracking thing didn't go very well, did it? No updates since December and I admit, life gets in the way and sitting in front of a computer is not what I want to do after a full day of work. I haven't had a magical transformation yet, but I have come a long way in terms of strength. I had set some goals to achieve by my birthday in July and I did it. I've been steadily going to the gym, just staying consistent and while the pounds haven't melted off of me, I am definitely stronger. Six months ago I could not do a full push up but today I can: Do 15 real push ups in a row.  I can maintain a wall sit for 3:30 with a 25 lb weight on my lap.  I can bench press 100 pounds.  I can do not 1, but 5 unassisted tricep dips.  I remember how hard it was just to keep my body weight up on the captain's chair (or the Power Tower at some gyms) at the Y. Now, I can walk right up to the equipment, pump out a few l...